Dang Scale

I hate that little piece of iron.   One day it's good to me and all is right with the world.  The next day it's mean to me and the world is a cruel place.  

I know I shouldn't place so much importance on the numbers that greet me every morning.  But I do.  I have worked hard to get where I'm at and I swear by all things holy that I will NOT go back to the weight I logged 16 years ago.  Never.  Ever!

So while I battle this middle-aged spread thing that I have going on right now...real or perceived...I try to remember ALL of the nutrition advice I've received throughout the years from nutritionists and trainers. 

Start my day with breakfast which includes a protein, carb and a fruit
Eat fruits before noon (gives body time to process the natural sugars)
Don't eat any carbs after 5pm. (gives body time to process carbs in to sugars)
Focus on protein
Quit drinking pop - even diet (too much sodium)
Drink water and lots of it
To lose 1lb of fat in one week, I need to cut 3,500 calories out of my diet
One lb of muscle burns an extra 50 calories per day - resting.  *Takeaway - Lift weights!*
Stay away from processed  carbs - white sugar, white flour.

Pretty sure there is more but these are the ones that stand out in my head. 

The numbers on the scale don't define who I am...I just know that I feel much MUCH better when I'm seeing lighter numbers on the scale.  Clothes fit better, I'm not as tired and I feel more motivated to make the daily changes I need to make when I see progress.

So, I pack my lunch every day and stay away from fast food.  I treat myself but hit the gym as soon as possible to work off those extra calories.   

I know I'm not alone in my battle.   There is comfort in knowing my misery is shared with others.   So may we support each other in our weight loss vision quest and defeat the scale!

Puppys

I took an ICAP dog out of the facility today and had him with me at my desk.   Sort of.   Elliott is this cute golden lab with a whole lot of attitude and personality.   It was his first time out of the prison other than for visits with the vet.

He is in the training phase and needs to be able to have exposure to all kinds of stimulus.  As soon as he hit the main gate, he had exposure.  Oh my gosh!  It's a wonder that I have an arm left.   I do not know if it was a combination of coming out of the facility, me being female or the fact that I didn't enforce the commands sternly enough.  Whatever it was, Elliott wasn't the stellar dog that I felt he should've been.  

He wouldn't sit or stay when commanded.   I had to repeat a command more than once...and in training, that isn't good.  It means the dog isn't focused on me, the handler.

I've had four dogs out now and I haven't had any problems with any of them until today.   I didn't give him very good marks on his "outing report card."   But I also stated that I felt it was a combination of things that made him hyper.

I'm not easily defeated.  I will take Elliott out again, and I will make sure that he gets a better score. 

Attitude and Disappointment

How does one keep a positive attitude in the shadow of a huge disappointment? 

JRCC is in the middle of a huge...I mean, HUGE, transformation.  The Warden of 16 years took another position within the DOCR.   His vacancy left the door open for upward movement through the ranks.   We've recently hired (from within) a new Warden, Deputy Warden, Chief of Security, Unit Manager, new Captain, two new Lieutenants and two new Lieutenants. 

With all of those promotions comes both joy,  for those who received the promotions, and disappointment for those who were not fortunate to be promoted.

There are so many hard feelings running through the staff.  Why did "they" get it over me?  I've been here longer!  I've worked hard to get where I'm at!  What could I have done differently?  I deserved the promotion, they didn't.

I feel for them.  I do.   I wish everyone could come out on top.  But there are only so many positions and not everyone can win. 

For those that were promoted, I congratulate you.   I have opinions about some of those promotions, but will not voice them.   Time will tell whether the right decisions were made.   PERFORMANCE will confirm it.  

For those that were not promoted....I say this....take a long, hard look at yourself.  Were you really prepared for the interview?  Do you view each day as a learning experience.   Do you know the facility and the daily in's and out's or running it?  Or do you go through the day on autopilot and just 'put in the time'?   What can YOU do better each and every day when you report to the front gate?
Are you a negative nelly - always the first to play the blame game?  Or are you one to take charge and dig down deep and go that extra mile to help fix that which is wrong?  Are you quick to criticize and the last to applaud effort?  Are you really a team player when it counts?  Or do you have that sense of entitlement? 

Morale is low....there is a lot of negative vibrations going through the facility.  I'm doing what I can to bring morale up...but I'm only one person.   Small things mean a lot...true...but it's going to take a whole lot of small things to turn things around.   Management has a long road ahead of them.  Change, in any organization, is inevitable.   It's how that change is handled that determines the final outcome.

Attitude can make or break an organization or institution.  Let's hope it doesn't break ours.  We can't afford to show weakness in front of the inmates.  But I'm afraid that's already happened.

Happy Easter

It''s Easter Sunday and spring has finally sprung in ND...at least for today.   The temperature is a balmy 73 degrees with a 25mph wind.   Windows are open and I'm loving it.  

I cook dinner for my in-laws today.   Originally it was just going to be me, T and Ella but I invited Bill and Jackie yesterday.  I always make far too much food as it is so I knew I had plenty.  I haven't seen them since they came back from wintering in Arizona.  Ham, mashed potatoes and gravy, green bean casserole, burnt buns and orange dreamsicle jello soup (my jello wouldn't set).     Oh, and Angelfood cake with strawberries, glaze and whipped cream.

As I was slicing the store bought Angelfood cake, I remembered my mother.   Angelfood was her absolute favorite.   She used to make them from scratch and when she did, she'd make 4 or 5 at a time.  She didn't frost them or anything - it was just plain, no fuss, no muss.   When she was on kidney dialysis, us kids would treat her once in a while with a piece or two.  Her eyes would light up and her smile would grow wider.   She loved her Angelfood cake.    So today, I remembered my mom as I sliced the cake.   I smiled as I had my first bite and thought of her. 

After everyone left and T went out to look for arrowheads, I changed clothes and went for a bike ride.   I bought a mountain bike at Scheels on Thursday.  Why?   Why not?!   Since I cannot run anymore and the doctor said that riding bike would be good for my knee to keep it moving and to strengthen the muscle., I decided to purchase a bike and give it a shot.  

I took it for it's maiden voyage today.  It went pretty good.  I didn't fall off or go ass over tea kettle.   The gravel is a little tough to ride on though as the gravel stones threaten my forward motion.  lol   I'm going to have to find some prairie trails to ride so that I don't get thrown from my aluminum ride. 
I went 3 miles today.  It feels good...I can tell I am going to need a few accessories....bike gloves being one of them.  The grooves of the handlebars were cutting in to my hand.   Of course, perhaps it was the death grip I had on them that was the cause of the pain and not the grooves :)  I can tell already that I'm going to have fun on the bike...exploring and just getting out in nature.  Thursday nights, Friday nights and Saturdays and Sundays are going to be riding days.  

What's on deck for the upcoming week?  Yoga and gym...pretty much the story of my life.  

Have a good one everyone.