The weekend doesn't get planned....sometimes it happens all on its own
I had no plans for the weekend on Friday afternoon, but by 7pm that night, my Saturday was booked up.
I received a voicemail from my older brother, Ron (Bismarck), stating that my great-nephew Brackston would be playing in a basketball tournament (3rd grade) at the Y in Jamestown at 8 am Saturday morning. There was no way I was going to miss that. But 8 am? Really? I'd so been looking forward to sleeping in, or rather, my body was looking forward to sleeping in. Since I've been dealing with health issues it seems that I cannot get enough sleep lately.
So this is what I did: I set the alarm but promised myself that if my body chose to sleep in, I would let it. Guess what? Ya, I beat the alarm up at 6:30. Darnnit! So I showered, dressed and headed in to town to watch my Brackston play ball. His team lost 40-4. :(
I still had to pick my mother in law up for groceries and brunch, so as I left at 9::30, my brother Terry and his wife Marna arrived in time to watch the 2nd game being played at 10.
After I returned Ella home for her nap, I hit the gym to work off a little bit of stress with some cardio and weights. With workout accomplished, I headed back up to watch the last game Brackston met me with a great big hug. as did his brother Brennen (who had arrived with his father, Mark). I got to catch up with what he was doing also. He's apparently going to be part of the Bismarck Civic Orchestra playing with Mark woods on April 16th. (I anticipate a road trip so I can see him - Brennen- perform).
Then...I got to go home and get cleaned up and get ready for a night out to the annual Dakota Anglers banquet. I'm not a fisher woman, but hubster is...so I went along. Hey, at least I didn't have to cook dinner. It was all good though... got to catch up with some of the other wives over a drink whilst the men listened attentively to the Game and Fish guy talk about some new breed of fish .
Today I did get to sleep in. Finally.... until the late hour of 7:30. lol Oh well. I cleaned house, I did laundry, and I did dishes. ...made lunch, went to the gym then took a stroll around the park (in 24 degree weather).
I'm tired tonight. I'm going to try and head to bed early and dream sweet dreams :)
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Letter to Self
Dear (younger) Self,
Allow me to introduce myself. I am the older, somewhat wiser, version of ourself. We are 50 now. Stop laughing, it's NOT funny! When we get to be our age, we won't think it's so funny.
I'm writing to us to share some wisdom in hopes that we will learn from our mistakes, before we make them.
I'm not here to lecture. I know that when we were young, we were wild and impetuous (you'll need to look that up). In truth, even in our older age, we tend to walk on the wild side once in a while. It's not a bad thing. It just means that we love life and embrace it wholeheartedly. Don't ever stop that. It's a good quality to have.
So, what do I want to tell us? Here are a few things.
Tell our parents that we love, love, LOVE them. And show them too! Don't be embarrassed by the fact that they are older than the parents of our classmates. It doesn't matter. They have so much love for us and show it in the little things they do...like take us to basketball games when I'm pretty sure they wanted to stay home on a Saturday night and sleep, baking cakes for cakewalks, painting giant Christmas cards on tag board (which is the prettiest in all of the school Christmas pageant). They may be older, but they are certainly wiser and full of love. They'd do anything for us, and they do. They leave us far too quickly. So when their health starts to deteriorate, spend more time with them! It's one of our biggest regrets.
And listen to their wisdom and really pay attention when they talk about their family history. It's ours too, you know? It really sucks in our older age when we try to remember something dad said about his family and we shake our head saying, "I wished I had paid attention." Better yet...go get the fricken tape recorder and start asking them questions and get it down on tape!
Take pictures. A LOT of family pictures. And those summer nights sitting around the picnic table that you think is totally boring? Suck it up girlie! Those were the greatest nights of our childhood and we'll wish we could relive them time and time again.
While we are talking family, we're going to be part of a sandwich that - due to the age of our parents - we didn't ask for. You see, you're going to always be the youngest of six kids; the baby of the family. Although there is quite an age difference between us and our older siblings, they love us unconditionally. We may not feel like their sister when we are younger. They're already adults with families of their own. Sometimes it will seem like we are just like one of their children. Hang in there; it all changes. We have a great relationship with them now; the memories we make in our older years with them are priceless.
And the good part? We have the best of two worlds. We are close to the same age as our nieces and nephews. When we are young that may seem like a royal pain in the ass. We get stuck running after them, playing ball with them , or just taking care of them while their parents and our parents are talking around the kitchen table. That's alright. Just do it. Know why? We have amazing relationships with our nieces and nephews now. We sort of grew up with them. The memories of those growing up times - our younger years - are the ties that bind us together now.
In our older age we still walk to the beat of a different drum. It's different than when we were younger and we labeled ourself nerdy or awkward and we didn't have a lot of friends. In our older age, our quirkiness is accepted and even admired. We have friends and they love us for who we are. So do not fret over being labeled weird. Those who called us weird are insignificant to us now and a distant memory. We have true blue friends in our life now who love and accept us for who we are.
Stay away from the tall dark handsome man who steals your heart with his good looks and smooth tongue. He breaks our heart in unimaginable ways and the scars will take years to heal.
Don't be afraid to take chances and step out of our comfort zone. There are some major decisions we make that brought us to where we are now. I'm not saying we made the wrong decision, but had we taken a chance and believed in ourself, we would be living a much different life right now.
Education is important. Pay more attention to school. And again, don't be afraid to take chances and believe that we can be anything that we want to be. Don't settle for what society says a woman should be... be a police officer, a social worker, an addiction counselor or a psychologist if we want to be.
Always remember to brush our teeth, morning, noon and night.
We like to be goddesses of the sun. So use sun screen and moisturize, moisturize, MOISTURIZE!
Ohhh, and never, ever go to bed without taking off our makeup. K?
Eat our vegetables and experiment with something other than corn or green beans.
EXERCISE!!! Start running, do yoga, ride bike, swimming. Just do something! We wasted a lot of good years being depressed and unhealthy because we were out of shape and in a dark place. We could've avoided it .all with a better diet and exercise. We teach yoga now. We're good at it..but we'd be much better at it if we'd started at age 10. lol
And do NOT start smoking! Trust me on this one. We don't look very pretty with a cigarette hanging out of our mouth. Aand the breath is ghastly!
This is important: When our cat Boris suffers his first seizure, take him to the vet right away. If we'd have done that, he might still be sitting on my lap right now. (I still miss and love my little buddy) :(
There will be people that cross our path, some of them good, some of them bad. Trust our instincts. Learn which ones are there to teach us something and which ones are there to catch us when we learned the lesson the hard way.
Most of all self, love us. We took some hard knocks in life because we didn't think that we were worthy of love. We are.
Allow me to introduce myself. I am the older, somewhat wiser, version of ourself. We are 50 now. Stop laughing, it's NOT funny! When we get to be our age, we won't think it's so funny.
I'm writing to us to share some wisdom in hopes that we will learn from our mistakes, before we make them.
I'm not here to lecture. I know that when we were young, we were wild and impetuous (you'll need to look that up). In truth, even in our older age, we tend to walk on the wild side once in a while. It's not a bad thing. It just means that we love life and embrace it wholeheartedly. Don't ever stop that. It's a good quality to have.
So, what do I want to tell us? Here are a few things.
Tell our parents that we love, love, LOVE them. And show them too! Don't be embarrassed by the fact that they are older than the parents of our classmates. It doesn't matter. They have so much love for us and show it in the little things they do...like take us to basketball games when I'm pretty sure they wanted to stay home on a Saturday night and sleep, baking cakes for cakewalks, painting giant Christmas cards on tag board (which is the prettiest in all of the school Christmas pageant). They may be older, but they are certainly wiser and full of love. They'd do anything for us, and they do. They leave us far too quickly. So when their health starts to deteriorate, spend more time with them! It's one of our biggest regrets.
And listen to their wisdom and really pay attention when they talk about their family history. It's ours too, you know? It really sucks in our older age when we try to remember something dad said about his family and we shake our head saying, "I wished I had paid attention." Better yet...go get the fricken tape recorder and start asking them questions and get it down on tape!
Take pictures. A LOT of family pictures. And those summer nights sitting around the picnic table that you think is totally boring? Suck it up girlie! Those were the greatest nights of our childhood and we'll wish we could relive them time and time again.
While we are talking family, we're going to be part of a sandwich that - due to the age of our parents - we didn't ask for. You see, you're going to always be the youngest of six kids; the baby of the family. Although there is quite an age difference between us and our older siblings, they love us unconditionally. We may not feel like their sister when we are younger. They're already adults with families of their own. Sometimes it will seem like we are just like one of their children. Hang in there; it all changes. We have a great relationship with them now; the memories we make in our older years with them are priceless.
And the good part? We have the best of two worlds. We are close to the same age as our nieces and nephews. When we are young that may seem like a royal pain in the ass. We get stuck running after them, playing ball with them , or just taking care of them while their parents and our parents are talking around the kitchen table. That's alright. Just do it. Know why? We have amazing relationships with our nieces and nephews now. We sort of grew up with them. The memories of those growing up times - our younger years - are the ties that bind us together now.
In our older age we still walk to the beat of a different drum. It's different than when we were younger and we labeled ourself nerdy or awkward and we didn't have a lot of friends. In our older age, our quirkiness is accepted and even admired. We have friends and they love us for who we are. So do not fret over being labeled weird. Those who called us weird are insignificant to us now and a distant memory. We have true blue friends in our life now who love and accept us for who we are.
Stay away from the tall dark handsome man who steals your heart with his good looks and smooth tongue. He breaks our heart in unimaginable ways and the scars will take years to heal.
Don't be afraid to take chances and step out of our comfort zone. There are some major decisions we make that brought us to where we are now. I'm not saying we made the wrong decision, but had we taken a chance and believed in ourself, we would be living a much different life right now.
Education is important. Pay more attention to school. And again, don't be afraid to take chances and believe that we can be anything that we want to be. Don't settle for what society says a woman should be... be a police officer, a social worker, an addiction counselor or a psychologist if we want to be.
Always remember to brush our teeth, morning, noon and night.
We like to be goddesses of the sun. So use sun screen and moisturize, moisturize, MOISTURIZE!
Ohhh, and never, ever go to bed without taking off our makeup. K?
Eat our vegetables and experiment with something other than corn or green beans.
EXERCISE!!! Start running, do yoga, ride bike, swimming. Just do something! We wasted a lot of good years being depressed and unhealthy because we were out of shape and in a dark place. We could've avoided it .all with a better diet and exercise. We teach yoga now. We're good at it..but we'd be much better at it if we'd started at age 10. lol
And do NOT start smoking! Trust me on this one. We don't look very pretty with a cigarette hanging out of our mouth. Aand the breath is ghastly!
This is important: When our cat Boris suffers his first seizure, take him to the vet right away. If we'd have done that, he might still be sitting on my lap right now. (I still miss and love my little buddy) :(
There will be people that cross our path, some of them good, some of them bad. Trust our instincts. Learn which ones are there to teach us something and which ones are there to catch us when we learned the lesson the hard way.
Most of all self, love us. We took some hard knocks in life because we didn't think that we were worthy of love. We are.
Sunday, March 3, 2013
What is my greatest fear
..in life.
Someone recently asked me that question. I instantly choked up and teared up when I gave my response, "If I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing." I answered.
They asked, "In this moment? Right now?"
"In my life."
They wanted me to elaborate but I couldn't, because I was emotional as hell and couldn't form a coherent thought, let alone a sentence, if my life had depended on it.
But I'm calmer now and more able to answer them - if they're reading this, that is.
My biggest fear in life is perhaps not "If I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing," as I originally answered, but more of "Am I doing enough."
I'm a firm believer in the phrase, "Life is not a spectator sport." It's meant to be lived and experienced, and not to be enjoyed from a rocking chair looking out the window...unless, of course, I'm 99 years old and am no longer ambulatory.
Why do I believe this?
For many years I stopped living. I was 100 lbs over weight, I was unhappy with my life and ate myself in to oblivion so I could escape the pain I was feeling, with myself, my weight, my relationships, jobs, everything. I did a good job of acting. One of my neighbors gave me what she thought was a compliment, "You have such a pretty face" and "You're so jovial...so cute and round just like a cherub."
Right. Tell a fat girl she's cute and round...that'll make her feel sooooo much better.
I've worked hard to lose weight in order to be healthier in not only my body but my mind as well. I've done well with that, I think. Oh sure, I could always be better, but who couldn't? No one is perfect. Perfection is just an illusion as it's realistically unattainable.
But my greatest fear is am I doing enough with my life.
I don't want to be one of those people who sits back to write their own obituary (so their family doesn't have to) and end up writing a few sentences because they can't think of a single thing that they've accomplished in their life. You know the one that would say, "Sherry Schutt died today at age 50. She was a good person who loved life and did absolutely NOTHING to show that she did."
I want to know that I did ENOUGH to fill the page with LIFE...to show that I loved it and lived it.
I don't want to be on my deathbed and have the one regret of wishing I had done more with my life.
Someone recently asked me that question. I instantly choked up and teared up when I gave my response, "If I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing." I answered.
They asked, "In this moment? Right now?"
"In my life."
They wanted me to elaborate but I couldn't, because I was emotional as hell and couldn't form a coherent thought, let alone a sentence, if my life had depended on it.
But I'm calmer now and more able to answer them - if they're reading this, that is.
My biggest fear in life is perhaps not "If I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing," as I originally answered, but more of "Am I doing enough."
I'm a firm believer in the phrase, "Life is not a spectator sport." It's meant to be lived and experienced, and not to be enjoyed from a rocking chair looking out the window...unless, of course, I'm 99 years old and am no longer ambulatory.
Why do I believe this?
For many years I stopped living. I was 100 lbs over weight, I was unhappy with my life and ate myself in to oblivion so I could escape the pain I was feeling, with myself, my weight, my relationships, jobs, everything. I did a good job of acting. One of my neighbors gave me what she thought was a compliment, "You have such a pretty face" and "You're so jovial...so cute and round just like a cherub."
Right. Tell a fat girl she's cute and round...that'll make her feel sooooo much better.
I've worked hard to lose weight in order to be healthier in not only my body but my mind as well. I've done well with that, I think. Oh sure, I could always be better, but who couldn't? No one is perfect. Perfection is just an illusion as it's realistically unattainable.
But my greatest fear is am I doing enough with my life.
I don't want to be one of those people who sits back to write their own obituary (so their family doesn't have to) and end up writing a few sentences because they can't think of a single thing that they've accomplished in their life. You know the one that would say, "Sherry Schutt died today at age 50. She was a good person who loved life and did absolutely NOTHING to show that she did."
I want to know that I did ENOUGH to fill the page with LIFE...to show that I loved it and lived it.
I don't want to be on my deathbed and have the one regret of wishing I had done more with my life.
Friday, March 1, 2013
Connection
There comes a time in everyone's life when you run in to someone that makes you sit up and take notice...not of them, but of yourself.
They get inside your mind and heart. They ask simple questions that make you think...and start to ask some in depth questions about yourself.
They may be doing it on purpose, or it may be that they genuinely are interested in what you are all about. It doesn't matter. The connection they are creating to your own self is monumental.
By their words and questions, the connection of "Who I am" begins to happen. The connection on a deeper level that makes you think about who you are, what you're about, what you stand for, and what is in your heart.
These types of people do not enter a person's life often. Their mere presence makes you more aware of who you are as a person. That, people, is priceless.
Embrace those people and keep them in your life. Whether they know what they are doing or not, they're their for a reason, and the connection between you and them is meant to be.
They get inside your mind and heart. They ask simple questions that make you think...and start to ask some in depth questions about yourself.
They may be doing it on purpose, or it may be that they genuinely are interested in what you are all about. It doesn't matter. The connection they are creating to your own self is monumental.
By their words and questions, the connection of "Who I am" begins to happen. The connection on a deeper level that makes you think about who you are, what you're about, what you stand for, and what is in your heart.
These types of people do not enter a person's life often. Their mere presence makes you more aware of who you are as a person. That, people, is priceless.
Embrace those people and keep them in your life. Whether they know what they are doing or not, they're their for a reason, and the connection between you and them is meant to be.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)