Live

My heart aches for those experiencing any type of darkness in their lives.  So many people are struggling with loss, health, self-esteem, family or work issues.  

 

I listen to all of you, I hear all of you, I embrace all of you.   Your burdens become my burdens and I stand with you as you fight to build a beam of light in your tunnel of darkness. 

 

I want to help, I want to fix, I want to take you by the hand and guide you to happier times.   But I cannot.   I have learned, through fighting through my own trials and tribulations, that no one can fix you ...except you.

 

When motivation to get up the couch and take a walk escapes you, look at the person who is fighting cancer.

 

When family issues pull you down, look to the orphan who has no family.

 

When your finances are slim, look to the homeless person.

 

When your job has your stomach turning in knots, look to the person who has no job.

 

It's going to take work.  It's going to take some perseverance and determination to make things better.  It may be that you need to set the only goal of just waking up and believing that each day is a new day to get it right. 

 

 There are going to be good days and bad days.   More often than not, you'll have more bad days than good.  When you have the good days, celebrate them, embrace them, and look forward to them, remember the feeling of them.   Then strive to make several of them, in succession, so eventually you have more good days than bad.

 

This video spoke to me so much that I wanted to share it.  The young man in this video has limited years to live due to CF.   He fights to live each day as if it were his last.  It's a wakeup call to the able bodied people who are sitting on the couch, wishing their life were better.  

 

Life doesn't come with a remote - you have to get up and change it yourself.

 

 

 

 

2015

We're 9 days in to 2015.  Hard to believe; time is going too fast.  Life is going too fast. It seemed like yesterday that I was blogging about Firsts.  Yet when I look at the date, I see that it was November. 

Life seems to move at a fast pace while standing still.   My days are extremely busy, the hours move at break-pace speed.  I'm working hard, I'm busy, every single day.  So much so that I have a note on my google calendar for Sundays - "Sherry's Day - Don't schedule anything."   I give so much of myself to everyone Monday through Saturday that I think I deserve the right to give Me one day out of the week to disconnect with the world.  To escape.   Which in my world usually means hitting the gym, bike riding (in the summer) for hours, taking out an ICAP dog or spending time with friends.

My mother in law is doing a little better I guess.  We've put her on an appetite stimulant and it seems to be working.  She's gone from a gaunt 73 lbs to 81 lbs in a month.  She's still a cantankerous 94 yr old lady who is depressed and never happy with anything or anyone in her life.  It sucks the happy right out of me whenever I go visit her.  But I love her and would do anything for her. 

Work is ok.  A co-worker is gone for 8 weeks and another will be gone for four weeks.  I'll be pulling double and triple duty.  It sucks.  I'm busy with my own work but then you add on their work and it's going to be sheer craziness.   It's a good thing I do yoga!

I do not know what 2015 holds in store for me.  None of us have that crystal ball, do we?  I do plan on living life, being the best that I can be, keeping an open heart and to keep on believing - in myself, in others, life and love. 

Firsts

It's amazing how fulfilling stepping out of one's comfort zone can be.  During this past weekend I did just that, twice.

On Friday night I walked in a parade.  That's a first for me.   I've watched plenty of them but never walked in one.   JRCC A-shift (and friends) constructed a float that ultimately won "Most Original" float of the parade.   It was an amazing concept of a gift, wrapped with a bow and tag "From JRCC."   But, the sides opened up to reveal a family sitting I in front of the fire place and the Christmas tree.   It was a brilliant concept and executed beautifully.  Thank you A-shift.  I walked with an ICAP dog named Ida.  She's a pretty little golden lab.  Our start to the evening was a little rough as I scared her by wearing a bombardier hat. However, we made up and she did very well through the parade considering it was her first parade too.    It was blooming cold though.  And I loved every single minute of it! 

JRCC has been very short staffed.  Every day the Admin Captain sends out emails about shift open to work.   I bit the bullet and signed up for a shift which was last night.   I signed up for the 2-10 shift and worked with A-shift in the SAU (Special Assistance Unit) for the criminally disturbed inmates.  It was quite interesting.  I was very nervous but towards the end of the shift I was settling in to the routine.   I was on guard with everything and everyone (inmates).  I observed the stellar work of the correctional officers as they interacted with inmates that could turn on them in a heartbeat.  They seemed relaxed but I knew they were ready to react in a heartbeat.  They're professionals and great at what they do.  One of the officers asked me if I had a good shift.  I replied, "I guess so."  He's an older man who is actually retiring today due to health issues (cancer).   He smiled and asked me these questions.  1)  Did anyone escape? 2) Did anyone die? 3) Are you going home?    When I answered No, No and Yes, he said, "Then you had a good shift."   (Thank you Lloyd).   

I was fortunate to work with A-shift.  I have a lot of friends on A-shift.  They helped me be not quite as nervous and filled me in on what to expect.   I've worked at the prison for 15 years but this is only the 2nd shift that I've worked.   Now that I know I can be an effective shift member, I will sign up for another shift if needed - and my schedule allows.  

Caring

This quote was on my calendar today.  Loved it so much I had to share:

The capacity for caring illuminates any relationship.   The more people you care about, and the more intensely you care, the more alive you are